i missed the sunlight.
days like today i think: “rooms without windows should be outlawed.” at 8ish i finished my programming project, indifferent about the minor speed improvements i’d made, sulking for having stood up the precious sun, a little concerned it might never come back.
even the most dependable things don’t always come back.
but this is physics, who never goes to bed angry, and barring the arrival of any asteroids or time warps, i believe that the sun will again wake me in the morning with a spoon.
and the night brings the stars and a breeze and my feet that need to move forward. once again i avoided treading on the roadkill on my darkened avenue. poor opossum. i never knew it personally, only from it’s death as an opossum to its re-birth as roadkill and its evolution to a mere tuft of fur embedded in the pavement.
it’s been a long journey.
tonight’s it’s hard to worry about anything. it’s easy to be sad and soulfully reflective. but worry? i think i’ve had it with worrying. tonight i feel full of love. tonight i feel like spooning with my self-indulgences. tonight i fondle
making pizza. from scratch.
chopping carrots and green peppers.
cold bier
at a red light, setting fuzzy dice into motion
the way james still calls me for smoke breaks
the way the weather in austin stays perfect for days and days and days
listening to prince while i work out
the way my neighbor spends her mornings tending her garden
the way ivy tries to be a human, and sleeps with his head on my pillow and his paw on my face
jimmy john’s, #6, easy cheese easy mayo, vinegar and oregano
getting the hell out of dodge
seeing every goddam place i can, even if it ends up being State College, PA
rollerblading really really really fast
being naughty
what me worry? maybe tomorrow.
All morning I’ve been jonesing to write.
Write paragraphs.
Not code, like I’ve been doing.
My thoughts are on editorials that matter only to me, but I put them out of my head like so many other words I will never say, that you will never hear, only to have them creep up in vivid dreams of adventure and love untold.
Proofeading, I originally mistyped “cream” instead of “creep” in the above paragraph. I wonder why. Cream, sh-boogie bop?
And I’m paranoid, because my writing needs practice. How will I ever find “my voice”?
Going through the motions is making me generic. It’s time to rock until your face melts off.
Until I have time to write more, a haiku:
i feign interest,
eating yogurt with a fork.
you see through my bull.
Create ‘magnetic’ blog poetry about “Autumn” and the “chattahoochee”. Or edit the URL and create magnetic poetry from your own site (just replace the ‘www.spacekadet.org’ part with your own site’s url).
Here’s a link to Mark-the-creator’s original post.
Tim and I have invented a new pastime for the drives to his place: “Drive By Sterling”.
It’s quite simple really. We drive by Bruce Sterling’s house and see if he’s outside. Our first attempt found him on his porch with his laptop!
Drive by Sterlings to date: 1/3
The UIUC MacWarriors have created a nifty new web browser for Mac OS X called TrailBlazer. It’s catch phrase is something like “Making internet history” because the big feature of TrailBlazer is it’s innovative way of keeping track of the visited site history. The user can view a page that has thumbnails of all the sites they visited, with arrows connecting thumbnails to indicate how they got to each page. What’s even COOLER is that the history also stores content history, so within the thumbnails page you can search by web content to find the web site you’re looking for.
I tried out the browser and while it’s missing out on certain features I like (tabbed browsing’s a big one), I can immediately see how their history display could be useful (who always remembers to bookmark?). My beef is that showing all those thumbnails gets pretty slow on my iBook. I’d like an option to show the text-only history list but with the added search-by-content capability.
They’re website includes a somewhat blurry Quicktime movie demo of TrailBlazer.
Yay MacWarriors!
Published on March 26, 2004
in photos.
Universities really need to get together and schedule their Spring Breaks at the same time.
This week, while I was recovering from Spring Break last week, UIUC students were enjoying their own week of freedom. This brought Braden and Jennifer to town. Wednesday they crashed at my place. That night, I felt it was my duty to introduce them to the Austin coolness that is Hyde Park.
Naturally, I took them to the Parlor.
My favorite punk rock pizza pub was received well, as expected. Afterwards we moved the party back to my place. I had an excellent time catching up with Braden and meeting his girlfriend (I’m sorry Braden, but your girlfriend is cooler than you!). There was some drunkenness involved, and I even talked about politics for a few minutes. Eventually, a raccoon came by and climbed the tree in my yard. Tim snapped these pictures with my camera. Check out the amazing tongue on that beast!
I never meant 2 cause u any sorrow
I never meant 2 cause u any pain
I only wanted 2 one time see u laughing
I only wanted 2 see u laughing in the purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
I only wanted 2 see u bathing in the purple rain
I never wanted 2 be your weekend lover
I only wanted 2 be some kind of friend
Baby, I could never steal u from another
It’s such a shame our friendship had 2 end
Purple rain, purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
I only wanted 2 see u underneath the purple rain
Honey, I know, I know, I know times r changing
It’s time we all reached out 4 something new
That means u 2
U say u want a leader
But u can’t seem 2 make up your mind
I think u better close it
And let me guide u 2 the purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain…
I only want 2 see u, only want 2 see u
In the purple rain
Monday morning you sure look fine
Friday I got travelin on my mind
First you love me, then you fade away
I can’t go on believin’ this way
I got nothing but love for you
Now tell me what you really wanna do
First you love me then you get on down the line
But I don’t mind.
I don’t mind
I’ll be there if you want me to
No one else that could ever do
Got to get some peace in my mind.
Monday morning you sure look fine
Friday I got travelin on my mind
First you love me then you say it’s wrong
You know I can’t go on believing for long
But you know it’s true
You only want me when I get over you
First you love me then you get on down the line
But I don’t mind
No, I don’t mind
I’ll be there if you want me to
No one else that could ever do
Got to get some peace in my mind
I couldn’t sleep last night.
At first I was kept up by a red bull … that was necessary to wake me up … in order to study for an exam … so that I might do well in my java class … so that i might have some useful skills in the real world … so that i might be given money to implement my skills … so i might be able to get rich and famous enough to be successful in my own band, no matter how bad we are.
I took an email break and started sifting through some old mail in search of a link I wanted to send a friend. First of all, the Search function in Mail.app sucks so I essentially had to go through e-mails one by one looking for urls. I have so much e-mail saved on my computer, from so many people I barely speak to anymore.
“What, didn’t those 516 messages I sent you mean anything to you??”
This is life and I don’t mind, and I got to laugh, cuz the people I know write freakin’ hilarious emails.
So now that it’s today, and I’m sleepy and nostalgic and working my mind so-oh-good trying to hang on to the subtle differences between member classes, factory classes, blah blah blah
I find myself in the mood for a little D. Plan. They’re lyrics are awesome. And it makes me moist to know that their sexy lead singer, Travis Morrison, is still out there making music and updating his blog. Grab a change of underwear and check out his MP3’s.
If I were in a cover band (just give me time, baby), I’d say: “this song is for all the good people i’ve been lucky to know in my life — i miss you guys.”
Continue reading ‘In Memory of the Dismemberment Plan (and all my far flung fancies)’
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